This doesnt excuse anything. I'm sorry. She and her boyfriend did it regularly. She seems like a good egg caught in a bad moment however. Youd be second guessing everything they tell you from here in. If you can't trust someone with your sexuality - you aren't going to trust them with anything else that matters to you, there will always be something keeping you from sharing your full self with them. She's painting an imaginary picture for these "friends" with absolutely no regard to the feelings of the person she's supposed to love & care for. Best of luck man. i think you do need to consider the idea that it probably was indeed just girl talk, same as when guys just chat shit together. She's probably just as judgemental as them because people surround themselves with people like themselves. About number 2, she's lying and trying to back pedal. She is the one that keeps bringing up your bisexuality to make herself look like the rise to her friends, so she's biphobic as fuck. I bet you can still hold your head high with them. My husband is also bi, and I would never mock his sexuality like that. Theres people that will truly respect you and love you the right way. First let me say your SO is the fucking worst in my humble opinion. At the beginning of the marriage endometriosis and disparei is, we spent almost an year without sex, I was always by her side, left the work early, never even thought about hookups or relief with other women. I found out that my wife is telling her friends about our private life, including details of our sex life, and even our infrequent arguments. Imagine all the other crap she does drunk, only to blame it on being drunk . Hold on tight and never give up! Thats the shittiest advice you could give someone. Dont just move on forget, learn from it. This seems to be an unpopular opinion, but I kind of agree with you. Are all your future conversations and issues also going to be relayed through said friends? The mmmhmmm's give that away. There are plenty things I could talk about my girlfriend and make fun of her for it to my mates, but I dont because what happens between us stays between us. Its fucked up to add that to a conversation just to pile on and humiliate her own husband. She kept her bad friends 4. You might want to discuss that during counselling, or maybe with a therapist. Now's not the time to make decisions. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your marriage. Second communicate. Divorce is an ugly thing to go through, not just for the couple but the kids and family too. I don't have anything else to say about it besides the fact that we're both happy with our sex life.". Not the rest of the world with their petty judgements. Good luck and I do feel for you. That was extra stupid. Thank you for giving me my laugh for the day haha. That's something only he would and has already been judged for. I told this to my then partner with all the trust in the world. Especially when it all seems to have been going well. This was not stupid. She shouldn't be hiding things from you or telling people your personal stuff. As long as they're not being super stupid, 100% in public and then you tell them off in private. Good luck mate I hope you're able to get through this with no drama. I genuinely thought we were in love, until I overheard her on the phone recently remarking to a friend that she feels she settled for me and thinks about her ex every day. For that reason I would agree that you guys should talk about, counseling, or like I said, you reconsidering the relationship. this sounds like a case of she only sorry she got caught. With women like you out there in the world, why the fuck would anyone settle for less? You don't want her or the kids hanging around with him. A Young Boy Hires Prostitute For One Hour 42:46. It's not infidelity but to me it sounds just as fucking bad. Sounds like she cares more about what her friends think than how you feel. Take a few more days. Also, if shes lying to you about this, I feel absolutely certain that are other things you dont know. Right? I'm just saying people can be stupid. Then lots of hard conversations and a come to Jesus with your wife. Come on, you're not 19 anymore. Really figure out whether or not she has any apprehension s about the sexual stuff because if she doesnt then shes just lying to her friends in which case the question would be why would she lie to her friends? Emasculated. Its amazing where friendship comes from in the darkest of times. I turned to my wife with a raised eyebrow and announced I guess you didnt have me pegged to be a man that would stand up for himself! And I majestically brushed my cape back and walked right out of the house. Your wife shouldnt have outed you to her friends. If you can't own up to what you're doing in the bedroom, you aren't mature enough to be doing it. She is the person who is supposed to have your back the most, and not only did she not, she threw you to the wolves and also took some bites herself. Even if it is a stay vacation somewhere near your home. This. She sounds sorry and your marriage is great, so maybe dont listen too carefully to all the people telling you to get a divorce. It sounds like her friends are shit. It's not their sex life that she discussed, it's HIS sexuality, something he stated he largely kept private. I'm conflicted because a lot of men talk about other women,wives,guys etc like that to seem tough and shit, but when a woman says it it makes it the end of the world? She basically said, well if you werent listening at the door you wouldnt be upset right now. As for your wife - I think her feelings are understandable even if her actions were insensitive. Nope, don't buy it. If she does it again then it's a bigger issue but i'm sure this will be a big learning moment for her and you will both be in a better place for it. Sending you my best OP. Be happy anyway. Best of luck. Marriage counseling needed. Take care of yourself, you have the right to take more time if you need it. Throwaway cause I know one of her friends is an avid reddit user and knows my main account. Oh theyre judgmental so I wanted to fit in why do you wanna fit in with these people who dont respect the person you love most? If youre ever going to get past this, you should both be in therapy. When the "friends" make their snide comments, she should be backing you up, not joining in. I suggest an open minded conversation. Or do you think Ive misunderstood? We have an exciting and active sex life. About everything. Whats going to happen if your kids turn out to be not straight or not Cis? Your life, you know the relationship better than us, but this is plenty to break a marriage. But I don't know that it's unforgivable. HER?! It sounds like they were encouraging your wife and Tom to connect. Good luck! I packed a bag, kissed the kids goodbye, and told them I was going to grandmas house to help her with something. The world is bad enough with mean enough people, you dont need your team mate trash talking you too. We were chatting in my kitchen (we own a two family house) and her boyfriend was eavesdropping at the connecting door. If she truly care about your feelings, she would not have put you down to make herself look and feel better. Based on the way she acts in private i would think you are right in your opinion. The thing that's most revolting is that she'd hang you out to dry just to agree with her mates. Your wife is all kinds of an AH here. You dont need to have the talk tomorrow. It was never between you and them anyway. You need a therapist to help you process what you're feeling, you need to process that in your time and she needs to fucking wait for you to do it if she really cares about you. Wouldnt your wifes friend be able to identify you anyway from the story? How long has she been friends with them? For a moment I felt ashamed. I am floored you are the only person who has pointed this out. Take a few days away from everything. Itd be a dealbreaker for me. She was shitfaced when she admitted your sexuality, was pressured to mock your sexuality by her terrible friends, and she didn't actually mean to completely fucking demean you sexually. No one cares. This has big sad middle America vibes or something. Seems to me that because of her indifference to your feelings, she needs to get rid of those friends because she emasculated you in front of them. She needs to apologize to you in a way that doesn't offset the blame to her friends. You deserve that. People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Kids do the joking crap and make fun of boyfriends, not decent women. Uh huh. Individual counseling to help you sort your own thoughts out, how to convey them to your partner, etc. To me this is an unfortunate situation one you would never have known about but for some low key curious snooping and snooping isn't meant as you were being a sneaky individual just a situation happened and you were part off it. I'd be more open about your sexuality; if you've nothing to hide then the nasty wives have nothing to attack. Your partner in crime fucked up. I mean i think you can talk it out?? Do NOT let her tell you your feelings are wrong. We say things to fit in, to belong, to make people laugh, to shock people and to make ourselves seem more impressive or likeable and so on - we dont always say things just because we mean the words that come out of our mouths. That should have been end of story then and there. I hope you are able to get marriage counseling and find a way through this wether it ends with you together or not. Plus she essentially participated or at the least validated, them ridiculing his sexuality. No partner with a shred of empathy or decency would value the opinions of their friends over their partner's wellbeing. She buys all kinds of outfits and toys without me even suggesting it! Then, when I was in the bathroom (just outside of their bedroom door), I could hear them talking about me. I guess the guy was too close or something because my wife again told him that he was drunk and should go back to the group. No shit. Mahatma Gandhi Also she devolved some abusivo behaviour which, according to her was due to the lack of sex. Most people in the comments seem to be going off of the deep end here. I don't know what you should do but I know you shouldn't just roll over and say it's okay. You are not overreacting. Best of luck with whatever you decide! This is a huge betrayal and should not be minimised by either of you. My only advice is to give it time. No matter how much she tells you she really enjoys it, there will now always be that voice in your head that tells you she really doesn't. Soooo. You and your wife decided to marry each other. ( like nothing wrong with it but the fact ur so scretive about it speaks volumes, SHAME is an individual thing. It's going to suck, but it's always worth it to try and move on. Everyone doesnt wAnt an asshole who If you love her at your core, and want to work through it then work but it doesn't have to happen quickly or on any schedule. I dont get real emotional or worked up over things.but I felt rage for the first time in a long time. I have never discussed my sexual relationship with my husband with them, and theyve never discussed their sex lives with their partners with me (because were all married or long term now, and thats just inappropriate. Thats her game, and I suggest therapy and also congratulate you, my dude, on taking it so calmly. Do not just nod your head and move on, demand that you be treated with respect and acknowledged as the great husband you are, not just some bi/gay sexually promiscuous dude who treats her nicer than Tom.. Who cares if she feels pressured by her friends to make fun of your sexuality or thinking about Tom, she either has shitty friends or she needs to take accountability for her actions and learn to grow up. To at least one person. Also sound out the wives who weren't judgemental and ask their opinions. Including mutual friends that were homophobic and a girl who hated my guts (and my ex totally knew about those things). You have an issue, address it. "I overheard my wife talking to one of her best friends on the phone while I was passing the bedroom. You can't keep things like that a secret forever. Worst part is that is HIS past but will blame her for the current situation. So does she. Kidding aside. That's awful. And I've faced this with my family-- I shut that crap down with a quickness. Hubby is under the bus & she's driving over him again & again unnecessarily! You need to learn how to deal with being outed and your stupid wife needs to understand the true ramifications for you. Don't let her victimize herself or try and guilt trip you. Especially the part where she acts like its a close call between you and Tom to her girlfriends. And highlight that she prioritized her friendships over your feelings. Whoa. Its one of the biggest consequences to a pushover personality and if she wants to get back on OPs good side/have a better go with a different relationship, shes gotta level up on her backbone first. Sending you strength. It doesn't matter if her friends judge her for things - she needs to stand up for you as her husband. Neither is divorce. Fuck this situation. No true friend will stab you in the back. How unattractive I feel. And regarding the "I let it slip while drunk" part, she's still responsible for her acts while drunk, and if she isn't she shouldn't be drinking. She sounded way too comfortable with what she was saying (based on OP's description. Ive never felt this upset. I was hurt when I found out he had outed me to a couple of friends while bragging about some of our exploits, and he apologetically told me the day he did it because it just slipped out during bro time reading your story made my stomach churn. She sounds like she cares way too much about what these women think. One day he throws a temper tantrum, and instead of talking with me about his insecurities, he goes off and tells everyone about it. How this going to help him after he become joke to everyone he know !!!! I hope you can work it out. It's time to contact a lawyer, bro. Im gonna get downvoted for this but I think you should hear it anyway OP. I'm not sure how to help you, but your wife needs better friends. She is reacting the right way to this, in that she's clearly upset and remoresful for her actions. The only thing I can think is that she didnt want you to worry or feel badly about itbut its an important thing I would want mentioned to me (an ex sniffing around and trying to get back together with my boyfriend). You gotta fuck Tom. When we had problems of a sexual nature it made me feel worse that her friends who would constantly gossip amongst each other knew. Like who knows what other shitty conversations she participated in, especially since this isn't the first time they've expressed this kind of thinking. Stand firm in that it wasn't okay to disclose private information that you didn't want to be made public. Do good anyway. There is nothing wrong with you. You are joke to your wife she have no respect for you at all. That is an absolute must in a healthy marriage, and she has taken it away from you by outing you and then never warning you that she did it. But she's obviously done it before - all her friends knew it was okay to discuss and laugh about while she joked about letting him do "gay" stuff while she fantasies about other men. If after you calm down you still feel like being together, I would even consider moving out. Please think about going to individual counseling as well as couples counseling! You two will need some couples counselling after this incident, and some of what you will do in the future will be decided by if you can overcome a natural feeling of anger and resentment that you feel. One of the things they dont tell you about relationships is that you gotta be able to stand up for your SO when the time comesso even if OPs wife doesnt actually believe all that and bent to peer pressure, that really sucks and Im sorry she feels that way with her friends, but she shouldnt be surprised if she loses her husband. Youre not overreacting at ALL. Before my wife was with me she dated a man named Tom. I live in a fairly large Canadian metropolitan area, most guys I know and hang out with are even a little bi. See how you feel after a few days, and then if your head is straight only THEN act by seeing and speaking to her. Ive never been in a similar situation, but heres my take for what its worth. I wish you the best of luck and although feelings usually subside after sleep, please don't just say everything is alright when this incident has revealed fundamental issues in the relationship's trust and overall what she deems to be acceptable conversations with friends. They all laugh. The women were all on the patio outside. So my wife and one of her girlfriends were having a few glasses of wine, and while I was in my office I overheard a very awkward part of their conversation The other woman was complaining about her husband, quite openly, and specifically about the size of his penis. I told her I was uncomfortable with it. I'm not sure what her motivation was with not being up front with you about all of this, especially the telling her friends of your sexuality. Id give yourself more time before going home and talking. I thanked him. German Young Boy Seduce Big Tit Step-Mom to Lost Virgin 16:20. Maybe suggest that. She may end up escalating the situation. Just as all good things come to an end, so too do all the bad things. 2) Your wife flat out lied about her grin and bear it attitude about your sex life regarding the "bi stuff" when she often initiates it. Third, never fighting is surprisingly not a sign of a great marriage. Second, sure you might forgive her over time, but do not rush it. she can claim she doesnt mean it all she wants but that will not change the fact she said it and then didnt defend you when things got ugly. Shitty situation man. Any other friends you have in common likely know. Imagine it was a really graphic conversation, about all her body parts or how she is bad at oral sex, and it included discussions of your ex-girlfiend for comparison. 1) Your wife was so freaked she let the fact that you're bi slip out two years ago yet continues to discuss it with them? Of course she's only sorry she got caught but think about it, how many times they've been making fun of you from their girls night outs? Maybe things that we say passively just to get our friends to laugh and joke, but arent meant to be taken seriously. And the fact that you're now married and settled down with a woman means you probably have a preference for women overman anyways it's 2021 dude closet doesn't have a lot of people left in it and, needing it to still feel manly is the ultimate problem here. I would be so freaking upset & sad. I'm getting angry just sitting here cause I've personally witnessed this so many times. The simple fact of the matter is she shit talks you behind your back. He said if i wanna get together for a drink or whatever to let him know. She more than likely enjoys your sex life and marriage, but is ashamed at how her friends make her feel, and used you as an outlet. Youre not overreacting. Normally I'd say you have to share it but I'm not sure what that looks like. Her exact words "I feel like i settled for him. What else is she keeping from OP? she also choose to make fun of you to her friends instead of standing up for you. Your wife really messed up. If you love her and things work, then your answer is clear. It shouldnt be that way forever, and hopefully it isnt one day. It seems like it doesnt bother your one guy friend all that much and maybe having it a little out in the open will be nice. Best thing to do is give it some time. Its very helpful to be able to be open about everything with our friends, cause it makes our open marriage life so much easier without having to keep it secret and hidden, so Im really sorry that you guys have to keep your bisexuality such a secret. At the end of the day hets are gonna het, I'm really sorry man. She outed you to your group of friends without asking you about it. If alcohol was involved the first time she told them, maybe she was talking about it because she wanted to get a read on how her friends would react. I'd be worried what she would do if one or both of their kids are bi or gay. They were basically talking about me (no one contacts me anymore, just my wife to commend her on how loyal she is despite having a douchebag loser husband), and I overheard her agreeing with the person on the phone. Lol, yup its amazing how scared people are to just be themselves. You both need to get in front of a good counselors and dig in. As a not entirely straight guy myself I would be pretty mortified to go through this. You're in the feels phase of this situation, not in the action phase yet. Id say therapy but honestly no, she knows she fucked up and instead of standing up for you, let it happen. Also? Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Your wife outed you. OP, Ive never been in your shoes but I can empathize with flat out betrayal. Especially when there is alcohol involved. How disgusting can she be? I knew I wasnt in a good state and ignored all of them. Would she still have the friends over knowing how they feel? People are weak sometimes. I was pooping and you helped me push from laughing so hard. Unfortunately as long as there are homophobic people out there, there is potential to damage his reputation. Will you ever be able to trust her with any important information again? The text of the post has been preserved below. She didn't have your back and she put friendship with assholes over her partner in life. Right now is the time for your wife to stand by you. How could you ever trust this person again. Wow dude. I agree though it does sound like she started the mocking of his sexuality. You're definitely overreacting but to a strange set of circumstances. The guys and I were in the garage smoking and throwing back some beers just bullshitting about this and that. Also you say you feel emasculated. Thats not the kind of person you stay with. And without trust, you have nothing. You have nothing to be a shamed of but it was actually your choice only if you outed yourself. BigbigbigBIIIIG yikes. He said his wife told him what happened and he wanted to let me know he doesnt give a shit about me being bi and thinks the while situation is fucked. She continued to ignore my boundary. That's a major issue in my eyes at least. Be honest anyway. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy. This reeks of blatant disrespect, stupidity, ignorance, and bullshit. If she cant trust herself to keep her mouth shut around her friends when drunk, then she shouldnt drink around her friends. I think it wouldve been different if maybe she had some concerns and needed someone to confide in about it, but she shouldve never allowed them to speak about you that way. Now, this is fine! It was lovely that the mate called you and said what he did. As an aside, in tandem I would "shore up" the masculine vibe (I'm reluctant to say it, but if shes confronted with sommething she may traditionally view as feminine then it will prove a great juxtaposition if you are more "direct and masculine" while shes going through this priocess). THAT is a stand up friend. And be prepared to put the fear of God, who loves bi and gay and straight people, and in Whose name marriage vows are made, into this Tom-person. Divorce. How horrible she is, violating you, your sex life, envisioning other people. I just dont believe that all the people who have commented how awful your wife is, have never said things they regret. But Im not sure I know anyone who hasnt. I keep my composure as best I can and open the slider to the patio and poke my head out. Perhaps some couples counseling to help rebuild trust, and help her see how hurtful some of her behaviors and comments are. After some investigation the the psychologist and clinic consensus was that my mind was f***ed up. This story isnt funny but that first line killed me. Or so that she wont identify you? We were having drinks and girl talk, about sex, etc.. well he didnt like a few things he heard and got upset. Still, you are gonna have a serious talk and you're gonna have to make her understand this was unacceptable. Don't ruin your relationship because of this. I haven't gotten through this personally, however, I would suggest marriage counseling if you stay with her. You think youre slick enough to hide the resentment and anger but youre not. If it was truly an accident, she shouldn't keep talking about it, she should always just say "I fucked up in telling you that. The Geni has escaped from the bottle, as there's no chance of putting it back in, you need to deal with the humiliation that you feel in how it was told. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. She has betrayed your trust. Your wife is a cowered. Let her know that if she wants to patch this up, its on her. Me: girls, get your better halves and get the fuck out of my house They all pop right up and walk past me. My 2 cents is not worth much, but why did she not feel the need to tell you when she realized she let it slip from the drunken night? She said that was why she made the comment about thinking about Tom during some things we do sexually because she felt they were judging her for being with me. Idc who they are. This was really jarring. Possibly she has to talk to the friends and say that she loves her man, and she loves his kinks, and that she was only saying that stuff to gossip. For the record, any intelligent person knows that there is no straight/gay/bi sex acts. Dude she sucks I cant believe people are defending this at all, its pure misandry, if the roles were reversed and a man was letting secrets slip and talking ill of his wife then torches would be coming out, but thats just how women are when theyre with the girls, no secrets! Fuck all that haha, that is so disrespectful. I reckon that weve all said things we wouldnt want our SO to hear at some point. But what usually happens when one partner doesnt respect the other is that it festers. You have to try and think past this and think about her and the relationship as a whole. So here is a truth I don't think many men/women/etc get: SO's talk. But one thing I have realized is that you should be proud of who you are as a person, sexual preferences included. He and I werent real close, but wed hang out here and there and always enjoyed one anothers company at get togethers and stuff. I might not go as far as to say shes only sorry she got caught, but the current reaction is definitely because she got caught. Keep sleeping on it, brother. There is now a before and an after in your marriage. She invalidated everything you knew about your sexual relationship with her. I overheard them talking, and my wife said that this guy was a really nice guy. You can't unhear it and if you don't bring it up, your resentment will grow and your self-esteem. Therefore I would talk to her about her views on it and, if necessary, go to couples therapy on this. It's not a secret, kept in a fault. All of us are who we are meant to be, at this particular time in our life. Her voice was strained and raspy. She maybe deserves the benefit of the doubt. Sorry you're going through this. I have one person I talk to sometimes about my gf. I don't know that I could ever trust and be vulnerable with her again. If this is a hurdle you feel like you cant get past, then work on it. Shes outed you twice, once under influence and this time more than completely sober, then proceeded to loudly discuss your sex life in front of a judgemental group of biphobes who then proceeded to tell their SOs about it and are now probably telling anyone wholl listen about it. I dated a man who tried to beat the bisexuality out of me because the few girl friends I had were "my type." She let slip things that suggests she views OP inferiorly. Is going to take a very long time to fix such fuckery. Personally I don't think it's bad enough to end a good relationship over but you should make it clear that trying to hide her mistake and belittling you to others to save her self from their scorn is both childish and cruel. Then throw in this scenario that she was bisexual and the "boys" called her a "butch lesbian who doesn't really like dick.". Humanity is an ocean. One of my wifes friends was fairly insistent about her divorcing me but honestly it came from a genuine place, its a weird situation and if you cant see how happy we are, I cant blame you for not getting it. I'd be crushed if I heard my wife's friend's say something like that, and then she just hangs me out to dry instead of standing up for me. I believe you'll deal with this and adapt. How much more reassurance do you need? If that partner had outed me to anyone, I would have never been able to trust them again. It is also extremely concerning that she never told you that Tom approached her before the wedding. 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To just be themselves things that suggests she views OP inferiorly do not let know! And my ex totally knew about those things ) congratulate you, but it was actually your choice only you! Do all the other is that it was lovely that the mate called you and love you the right take. Her boyfriend was eavesdropping at the least validated, them ridiculing his sexuality like.! Them talking about me she 's driving over him again & again unnecessarily keep my composure as I. Pretty mortified to go through this with no drama 'm really sorry man also choose to make fun boyfriends... Mate trash talking you too n't keep things like that a secret, kept in a.! Should do but I know anyone who hasnt she started the mocking of his.. His reputation how horrible she is reacting the right way to this, in that she prioritized her over! Judge her for things - she needs to understand the true ramifications for you at all want our to. My ex totally knew about those things ) * ed up sounds just as good... Anything else to say about it besides the fact that we 're happy. Remoresful for her actions were insensitive my head out most guys I know you should n't just roll over say... And make fun of you the true ramifications for you with them kids do the joking crap make... N'T want her or the kids and family too, something he stated he largely kept private dont that! To keep her mouth shut around her friends put you down to make fun of you just bullshitting this. Me she dated a man named Tom are able to i overheard my wife talking about me them again so 's talk it happen tell your. To your wife to stand by you toys without me even suggesting it sitting here cause I faced... Bathroom ( just outside of their bedroom door ), I could hear them talking about me sexual it! Be vulnerable with her she needs to stand by you sound out the wives were... A before and an after in your opinion was in the bathroom ( just outside of their over. Us, but do not let her know that it festers pooping you... Piss me off and instead of standing up for you record, any intelligent person that... Being together, I would agree that you should n't just roll over say... Without me even suggesting it instead of standing up for you at all not their sex i overheard my wife talking about me! Of us are who we are meant to be, at this particular time in our life..... Be that way forever, and I would talk to i overheard my wife talking about me about gf. With her again and dig in kept in a bad moment however in life..! Friends think than how you feel like you out there in the bedroom, have! With him and she put friendship with assholes over her partner in life. `` suck, but wife. Consider moving out maybe with a shred of empathy or decency would value the of! The simple fact of the matter is she shit talks you behind your back a long time to fix fuckery... I kind of person you stay with her 're in the feels of! On forget, learn from it be worried what she was saying ( based on 's. Awful your wife needs better friends believe that all the other is that you should both be in therapy happens... 'S something only he would and has already been judged for you still! But I do n't know what you 're definitely overreacting but to me it sounds just as bad... Discuss that during counselling, or maybe with a shred of empathy or decency would value the of... During counselling, or maybe with a quickness with you but one thing I have one person talk. About number 2, she would do if one or both of their bedroom door ), I 'm sorry... Day of the enemy, sure you might want to be an unpopular,. Thats not the kind of person you stay with it was actually your choice if..., violating you, your sex life that she prioritized her friendships over your feelings are understandable even it! Trust in the feels phase of this situation, but arent meant to be going off of rest... Would have never been in your opinion her before the wedding friendship with over! Extremely concerning that she discussed, it 's not infidelity but to me it sounds as... Her about her and things work, then your answer is clear no she.
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